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Cloud Atlas Review

Cloud Atlas suggests individual actions influence our lives and those around us through the past, present and future. Its 6 individual stories span from the mid 1800’s to 22nd Century Korea and are all linked together in one form or another.

Did Cloud Atlas successfully entwine these stories in a convincing and entertaining manner or did it simply spend close to 3 hours confusing the hell out of us?

Cloud Atlas, the Experience

I’m no different than anyone else as I typically form opinions on most movies prior to release. In this case, I thought Cloud Atlas looked intriguing enough to warrant a $15 buck ticket and about 3 times that on tasteless popcorn and a bladder busting Coca Cola.

I sat through the movie, had some laughs, saw some touching shit and then the end came and I literally had no idea what to do with myself?

Even now as I try to sum up Cloud Atlas in this movie review, I’m really at a loss for words.

…ask anyone I know, I’m never at a loss for words much to the chagrin of many I’m sure.

Cloud Atlas, the Good

First off, Cloud Atlas is a visually stunning movie. The camera work, the locations, even the CGI (most of it) is especially well done as is most of the makeup. Some of the story lines are particularly funny like the old fogies trapped in the home; absolutely hysterical and by far the best part of the entire movie!

Buddy in 22nd Century Seoul was also the man and kicked major aysh! I think this guy did a terrific job although I would have been just as happy had he thrown Sue Mee or whatever the hell her name was, off the bridge.

There are many good sub-stories in Cloud Atlas and any of them could be great movies if flushed out on their own.

The music was also very well done and helped convey what was happening on screen quite well.

Over all, Cloud Atlas had many things going for it but unfortunately I don’t believe the end was the sum of all parts. Cloud Atlas should have been epic but somehow fell short in the delivery.

…which leads me to…

Cloud Atlas, the Bad

Perhaps I should have read the book because the one thing I clearly missed was how did Tom Hanks for example, influence his past, present and future in any one part of the movie? The same can be said for all the actors, I just couldn’t see their links clearly.


While entertaining, it was a bit frustrating trying to understand some of the characters even at the most basic level.

Case in point, who the hell is this bloody guy –>

I got sick of green guy in the hat very, very quickly. Maybe he served a purpose but I found him absolutely annoying by the second hour.

For the most part I liked the actors/actresses but must confess, the only part of Halle Berry I care about starts at the knees and ends at the neck, the rest is human waste. Even though Hugh Grant did a reasonable job in this movie, he sux donkey balls too and I have no idea how he still manages to find work?

Susan Sarandon was also in this movie and it made me chuckle a bit. Even with all the makeup she still looked old, really, really old. I found myself wondering who was tucking Tim Robbins in at night and making sure he’s dressed in his footie pajamas?

Also, Somni-451 (Sue Mee as far as I’m concerned) was one of the most wooden characters I’ve ever seen. I just didn’t care about her at all and even though her story was important, she wasn’t.

Lastly, the pacing of Cloud Atlas was all over the place. The music would move along at it’s slow and steady pace, then something would happen, the music would pick up and I’d think to myself  “oh here we go, here’s my Inception moment” and then…nothing.

If you’ve ever driven a car with an F’d up spark plug, this is how it feels. It just sputters along and just when you think you’ll see some life, it hitches on you bad enough to make your sphincter pucker.

Cloud Atlas, the Verdict

In proof reading the above (numerous times hence the late review) I realize I’ve come across very negative of Cloud Atlas. I don’t want to convey negativity about the film, just share the issues I encountered. Even though I listed more “bad” than “good”, overall there was much more good in Cloud Atlas.

Of course I wanted very much to love Cloud Atlas and while I did enjoy myself I’m not sure I can recommend paying to see it in a theater. It is a good movie and I think one should see it however video may be a better (and cheaper) option.

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